An Artist?

What makes you an artist?

If I can draw or paint something that others think is beautiful. Or accurate. Or powerful. 

Am I an artist?

If the lines are correct, emotion impacted, is it art? Perhaps... Am I an artist?

I don't know. 

Does an artist merely create art? Produce art? Make artistic impressions from blank paper and a pencil? Or is it more?

Telling a story 

Sharing heart and soul 

A lifestyle of creativity 

Other than the status quo

Different 

Unique

Questioning what is

New ideas for what can be

An artist is a truth teller 

Inspired

Honest and hopeful 

Never content with the answer "no, that's not how it's done"

Burst through those boxes 

And be. 

Be yourself. 

And while you're at it splash some paint around.

Good Friday thoughts on Shawmut Ave

"The one who hung the earth upon the waters : today he is hung upon a cross" 

- Common Prayer, a liturgy for ordinary radicals  

GoodFriday by Josh Garrels

Friday around noon, the procession from The Cathedral of the Holy Cross came down my street and by my front door. 

I got a text from my housemate Cathi that they were coming, so i opened the door, with my cup of tea, and there, saw Jesus, bent under the weight of the cross, struggling down the street. Long dark hair, dark skin, rough linen robe, roman soldiers were yelling and whipping and there were others with small cross bars, struggling along side. They turned down Shawmut ave, and came towards me. A crowd followed yelling "crucify him!!" over and over and over... angry, mob. there were the chief priests and Pharisees talking together on the side, walking, dignified, long robes flowing and long beards

The street is cleared of cars from street cleaning on this side. 

people are filming, and taking pictures along the way with their ipads and cameras. 

I reach into my pocket to get my phone- Yes, my first thought is wow- i want to capture this moment and share it. 

spectator 

when i try to take a picture, A notice comes up - my pictures are full. The processing is going by - and i see the back of Jesus bent under the cross head around the corner. The soldiers with their robes and helmets are yelling and whipping. I am overwhelmed with a sense of sorrow for just being a "bystander" wanting to get a picture... and wondering if i had lived 2000 years ago, where would i have been? what would i have been doing? would i just be watching? The fear and intimidation of the occupying Roman forces would im sure have scared me from trying to do anything to help Jesus as he stumbled by, though maybe? maybe i would have come alongside Mary and wept with her and held her hand and shuffled alongside behind the crowds who have been swept up into this mob yelling "crucify him! Crucify him! He must die" No- do they know what they are saying? These same men and women were fed by his miracles, weren't they? amazed at the healing, his words of wisdom. Why this anger and blood thirsty excitement?! Is it sport? is it just drama? Is it just something we take a picture of and post on facebook? A good newsfeed? Intstagram it with a cool filter. 

Heartbreaking confusion, anguish, fear, why is this happening to the Lord? to Jesus? this one who came from Nazareth, born down in Bethlehem, this one who has shown us such love and compassion, and has opened up the Word and presence of God in such amazing ways. Jesus- why??? Why are they doing this to you? 

all this for me...?... yes. 

the procession passes by, with police cars taking up the rear, with their lights flashing, and as the last echos of "crucify him!!" fade away down the street i hear the ice cream truck's little jingle song playing in the distance. 

what a crazy world. 

----

later that day...

Good Friday service at South End neighborhood Church, combined with 3 or 4 other churches, English, Spanish, Amharic, and a few other languages represented in singing, prayers, testimonies, and looking at the last 7 words of Jesus from the cross. 

1) "Father Forgive them, for they know not what they are doing" (Luke 23:34)  Forgiveness: from Pastor C of SENCE, sharing that he is only able to fathom forgiving the man who shot and killed his son a few months ago, because of God in him, God's love and power. 

2) "today you will be with me in paradise" (Luke 23:43) From Pastor Jose Flores, sharing that this criminal had NOTHING to offer Jesus, he was about to die, and all he asked was to be remembered. not to be forgiven or saved, but remembered. He is not any further away, or closer to jesus than anyone else. we all have this same chance to come to Jesus, to ask to be remembered.

3) "Dear woman, here is your son" (john 19:26) A member of the Ethiopian church (emmanuel disciples church) shared the awe - we cannot fully understand what Jesus did for us- his divine blood covers us and frees us, and we don't know what He was meaning when he said this to Mary, but maybe he was saying "it will be ok - I am fulfilling the Father's will". How heartbreaking for Mary to see this pain. 

4) "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me!?" (Matt 27:46) Pastor Workneh Tesfaye from EDC shared that life is full of "Whys" and many questions, but we must follow Jesus example, and finish our "whys" in submission to the Father's will

5) "I am thirsty" (John 19:28) Carmen Barrientos from SENCE and Iglesia Communidad shared about Jesus' full humanity, and even to being thirsty. Remember the story of the Samaritan women? He asked her for a drink, and then also told her, that if she knew who he was she would be asking him for a drink, and he would give her living waters. He asked for a drink, while he was hanging there on the cross, to fulfill the scriptures, because he was tired and thirsty, and also perhaps to remind us - to ask him for a drink, to be thirty for him, and for the living waters that his death and resurrection provide for us. 

6) "It is finished" (john 19:30) Pastor Lowell Bowler from Dorchester Baptist Church asked the question "what was finished"?? Our debt was paid in full. done. complete. there is nothing we can add, or need to add. But out of the love in our hearts for Jesus, we want to serve and give our life to him.

7) "Father, into your hands i commit my spirit" (luke 23:46) Pastor Neal from SENCE shared again that Jesus submitted to the Father, he gave up his life willingly- it wasn't taken or forced, it was his love for us that held him there, and this is what brings us life and salvation. 

Thankful. 

I am so blessed to be a part of this community! 

We all circled around the large wooden cross, that was taken down from the wall and Nate held it up in the middle of the room. prayers and songs, and crying out to Jesus, thanking him for what he has done for us. 

Hallelujah!!  

---

After service I found out my friend Darla passed away that day. I've known her for several years, as she has struggled with homelessness and alcoholism, and come in and out of prostitution. She used to come over for tea on mondays, or stop by for a shower randomly, and would stay over night now and again. Once i helped dye her hair here in the bathroom. she liked to have jet black hair, and wanted to get rid of the grey that kept persisting. We did a pretty good job i think, and didn't make too much of a mess :) 

She had crazy unique rings on her fingers, often wore big clunky work boots, and was quick to laugh, even in the midst of the darkest seasons. Im going to miss you Darla. I gave her a pencil sketch of a girl with her face looking up into the rain when she had a place a while back here in the South End. As soon as she saw it in my room one night she identified with it, and felt it was a picture of her. I wonder what ever happened to that. 

Im sorry Darla... I wish there was a different ending. I trust that Jesus is holding you today though, that you are finally home, that you have finally found what you've been looking for all this time. The systems, the friends and families, even the churches of this world failed you in so many ways... But Jesus will never leave you or forsake you. I know you believe in him, and called out to him throughout your life. I trust that he has brought you home.  

"there in the ground, his body lay: Light of the world by Darkness slain..." 

but this is not the end...

Establish Peace 2014

"Lord, you establish peace for us; all that we have accomplished you have done for us." Isaiah 26:12

It's not about us. We are not in control. We can't bring peace. Yet, we have been invited to join God in bringing justice and peace, hope, light and freedom into dark and oppressive places! 2013 has been a crazy full, hard and amazing year- looking forward to what God has for 2014! Its not gonna be easy, but it will be beautiful. Ready for this??

my sister Jade

So, here's a little story - a glimpse into a one life, one of my girls:

Last night as i was making my way back into the city from speaking up on the north shore i was biking down tremont st (around 10:30pm). As I pass Park St, and the Blackseed cafe and St Pauls and down to the Lowes Theater, i always scan the sidewalks, steps, and roadside curbs for friends of mine who are struggling with homelessness and often hang out around there. I especially look out for my friend Jade. She is one of my "sisters" here in Boston. She has almost the same hair as i do, and except for the dark eye make up we really look very similar. Ive known her for about a year now i think. She struggles with addiction to alcohol and some drugs, and she doesn't like the rules and "stuff" at the shelters so she basically sticks to the streets. She is about 23 years old. Her mom passed away a few months back. Her boyfriend is in prison. She wants to be an advocate for the homeless, for the abused. To stand up for her rights and others who can't speak up for themselves. She doesn't trust people. she is angry. She wants to move to california... someday. 

So, as i was biking down the street i saw something out of the corner of my eye that made me think perhaps Jade was there around the corner, so i crossed the street and got off my bike and went to check. Yep, it was Jade, swearing loudly to a friend of hers that she doesn't F'n believe in a god that can let child molesters and rapists go free... roaming around hurting people. its just not right. how can God allow this??! "They let these rapists get out of prison and go into the shelters and abuse us! No body cares!" 

I walked up and gave her a hug. 

I said quietly, "you know that breaks His heart... that breaks God's heart" 

"I don't F'n care! I don't believe in an F'n god that allows that. Its so good to see you!"

"oh, no i mean the fact that there is molestation and abuse and rape happening, breaks God's heart. He is wanting to use us - you and me to do something about it!"

"oh i am! Im helping with a documentary, and helping organize a sit in up at the capitol to let people know...I am an advocate, I stand up for my rights. My sign there. Its a statement. a political statement" 

I look down at her cardboard sign taped together laying on the sidewalk and written in black sharpie it says "Please don't ask me to move. I don't want to Prostitute. This is my first amendment right to panhandle" (see the attached picture. I asked if i could take it to share and help spread the word) 

She told me about how the police tell her to move on- that "Stemming" or "panhandling" isn't allowed. but, as she says "what would you rather me do? Isn't this better then sell drugs or selling my A**??" I don't want to prostitute, i've done that and... no... i don't want to. 

ahh... my heart screams out - NO, please don't! and everyone in the city, can't you see how this is driving her to desperation? police officers, can't you help her rather than just shove her aside?! but i don't really say much - just nod in affirmation of her statement, of her sign. yet the right to panhandling wherever you want is not the answer either of course. a few bucks an hour, going to more booze and candy is not helpful here.

I watch her stuff while she goes over to the commons to pee in a cup. (there are no public restrooms around the commons that the homeless can access freely) she feels to ashamed to ask for the key at the Blackseed when she isn't buying anything. she didn't want me to get something. So, she leaves with her cup, and i stand with her stuff... and the sign there on the ground by my feet, and talk with her friend - i think his name is Daren. people walk by, glancing at the sign, at me, at us. confused. maybe? or maybe they don't really notice. I turn invisible amazing how easy it is. To be invisible. Ive never really understood why people want that as a super power. 

anyway - Jade returns and we chat for a bit more about ending child abuse and discrimination and then i give her some fire drops (thanks mom) and a Lara Bar (had to sneak that in her bag, she hates taking stuff from friends) and i give her a few hugs, and let her know she is in my prayers. Sisters. 

thanks for joining me in prayer for Jade. For safety, for a good network of supportive people around her where she can begin to build trust, and that Jesus will lovingly woo her to Himself. 

goodnight! 

sarah

A psalm:

I wrote this today on the train heading north for a meeting for Amirah. It is opening so soon!!! 

There has been a lot of sickness, and sorrow and pain this week: two friends passing from this life unexpectedly and young, and taken by senseless violence, perhaps accidental? unknown?  So much brokenness. it can be confusing, frustrating, exhausting  overwhelming .. and yet, still will i rejoice knowing that God IS, and He is HERE with us. One of the scriptures that is referred to below is Isaiah 61. 

so here goes... 

Praise him, praise him

Let all the earth rejoice

For The Lord is on the throne

The Lord of love and peace

Of righteousness and justice

Of holiness and purity 

He sits upon the throne and will never be shaken 

His victory is sure. Has already been won  

His beauty and joy advance into the darkness

The enemy territory yet tries to hold fast 

Tries to fight back 

The army of The Lord is stronghearted, yet meek

Quietly bold. 

Never intimidated 

Quick to listen 

Humble 

Ready for anything

Life screams from the gutters of destruction 

Fighting for breath 

Feeling abandoned, forgotten, abused, crushed 

Lord Are you there? Do you care?

Warriors among the trash heaps 

Sitting in silence 

Praying a prayer, grasping for hope

Breath of wind

Bird in fight 

Beauty of the sea and sky sings out 

"Take heart!!" 

Do not be afraid-

Rejoice! 

Let all the earth sing praise! 

For The Lord is on the throne

And has moved into our neighborhood 

Is here among us

The battle is won

In gladness trickling down our cheeks

In beauty bursting up from what was burnt and rubble 

In lives connecting breaking down barriers. 

Confessing 

Forgiving

 Love unfiltered, holy pure 

Stand firm, rooted in love, beauty and mercy 

And be not afraid 

Victory is here.

opportunity

Opportunity
access to...
   what you need to...
             Live?
Thrive!
Create
Dance
Imagine
BE

food to feed... Justly grown, harvested, processed, left alive to nourish, sometimes...?
Clothes to clothe... Justly grown, picked, spun, woven, pieced, shipped, purchased
Trends shift.
Tossed out.
What next?

"Id die for a pair of those!"
"really?" He asks. "I'll get you those baby - now, just help me out with one little thing..."
Opportunity seized.

who buys the shoes made by slaves for the girl he wil sell to a buyer purchasing her body for the same price or less?!
She is looking to belong, to be loved. He treats her nice, she wanted those shoes for since forever! (since they came out last month)
He is looking to belong, fit in, make money, prove his "manhood"
What is this "manhood" ? Identified by abuse and oppression and manipulation of others?!

The camera goes on.
abuse. Mutilation. violation
video uploaded - streamed to millions
viewing
corrupting
corroding heart and soul. destroying intimacy
on TVs, laptops, iphones and blackberries... Justly made? mind, molded, pieced, assembled... Sold.
to increase access to information
education
the world opens up ... to this??
Opportunity seized.

No! How can we create access to what you need to LIVE a life connected to the respect and dignity of self and others
THRIVE when others thrive and not on the oppression of anyone else?!
create, dance, imagine, BE
a world where life can be lived to the full

To love and be loved.
Opportunity seized.

"But unconditional love is always tied to justice. Justice is love on legs, spilling over into the public sphere" - Cornel West 

A week in April

One week ago, Monday the 15th of April at 2:50pm two bombs went off- one at the finish line of the 117th Boston Marathon, and one a little way down the road.
Boston, and the world was shocked.

#prayforboston

I was on the south shore at the time, heard from my friend's mom that something had happened and turned on the news 20 minutes after the explosions went off. Then after a bit I came back into the city. I live just down the street, and a friend was staying with us who had run the marathon, and was right there. many many other friends were right near by, or just up the road. It seems everyone in the city knows someone who was there if they weren't there themselves.
Im not sure how to process this entire week - yes, violence, tragedies, bomb explosions in war zones, guns and stabbings with gangs in our cities, earthquakes, tsunamis, catastrophic accidents...  are happening all over the world, even as im writing this. Yet. The world watched these bombs go off - random, senseless, sickening violence that had everyone shocked and confused. News casters didn't know what to even say. Blood, missing limbs, caos, panic... WHY??? I think that is what really strikes us all - the seeming lack of motive- the random act of violence to hurt people, whoever happened to be there. All on a beautiful Marathon Monday when we were watching the world's finest long-distance runners, spending time with family and friends - the sky was blue, bright clouds floating by, just the right air temperature. and then this.
Something happened here, that impacted this city, and the world, that is not so much related to the amount of injuries or how many people died... it is a taste of senseless, random violence against humanity... against us - crowd of family and friends at the marathon - Boston.
Not gang related, drug related, no war of power and political control motivating the act of setting these two explosives in the midst of the onlookers.
And yet, there were motives, we still don't know or understand, but we must acknowledge the pain and frustration, and trouble that drove these young men to do this. (what will we learn from this? are we listening?)
The world was watching. So it was an act of violence against all who were a part of that day - from all over the world.
It could have been so much "worse" - though from friends who were there, I have heard gruesome nightmares of stories. I try to hold it in "perspective" with whats happening around the world... yet, ive come to realize today, that I should not limit my reaction of sorrow and lament "Because others are experiencing this too and 'worse'" But rather, may this build my compassion, empathy, and ability to grieve along with others around the world, and here in my city who go through traumatic experiences, have had bombs dropped on their communities by us Americans, had friends killed in a street shooting... It is all heartbreaking.
To lament is to hope for, and have faith in something better- This is not what was meant to be. We are longing for a new City - the Kingdom of Heaven to come!

I just wanted to post a few images and some of my favorite quotes from people and friends from this past week.

------

Sadly after the bombings, people jumped to racially profiling those from the middle east, even in some media assumptions were being made. So maddening and sad. 

This author had some good and provocative thoughts to share... 

http://www.timwise.org

"White privilege is knowing that even if the Boston Marathon bomber turns out to be white, his or her identity will not result in white folks generally being singled out for suspicion by law enforcement, or the TSA, or the FBI.

White privilege is knowing that even if the bomber turns out to be white, no one will call for whites to be profiled as terrorists as a result, subjected to special screening, or threatened with deportation."

Colbert Report on 4/16/13 - 

Good job Colbert! I was skeptical, but you did good. And i needed to laugh. So thanks. 

Marvin Richards, 8 years old. Killed in the Marathon Bombing 

 from this blog: http://principlepictures.com/blog/2013/04/16/to-boston-from-kabul-with-love/
thoughts form my friend: http://marymitchell.co.uk/blog/2013/4/18-1

boys in Iraq have a message for Boston... from the website: Upworthy.com 

"original source of this picture i posted earlier. Let's keep sharing, and break the cycle of prejudice, racism and violence! I am so sorry friends from the Middle East for the way many in America jumped to blaming and racially profiling! Please forgive us! Lord have mercy! "

A sign with light near Symphony hall - I love the double meaning "Be Love!"
"darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that!" - MLK jr. 

Excerpt from Prayer request email sent out wednesday the 17th from a nurse at BMC, and friend of the Emmanuel Gospel Center:

please please please continue to pray for the victims and their families- this is a trauma that will go on for many days and weeks to come....

for so many there has been & will be the need for additional surgery.... (for the burns, to revise the amputation stump..... or as new amputations become necessary secondary to infection, poor vascular profusion, etc. ).....newly paralyzed, runners who will never run again, never dance again; embedded PLASTIC shrapnel- harder to locate in soft tissue (abdomen / arms /legs / faces)...the newly deaf - so many many have perforated ear drums - some will regain hearing - some will not.....this is an example of the "secondary trauma phase" - things that are not life threatening - but as people stabilize they are then hit with the new loss like their hearing, and the retraumatization of it ---- catastrophic loss on yet another level. 

Then Thursday night- a robbery of a 7/11 near MIT, a car hijacked, a shoot out killing an MIT security guard just an hour or so after i had left the area. I didn't realize it was connected to the marathon bombing until the next morning when i got a text "stay safe" at 6am. I checked the news on my phone, and the next 18 or so hours of surreal, city locked down, waiting, watching, not sure what might happen next, unfolded.

my FB status friday morning when we heard we were in "lock down": 

continuing to pray for our city! Stay safe friends, and lets not feed into the frenzy of fear and chaos... "You came near when i called on you; you said, "do not fear!" Lamentations 3:57

FB status mid day friday,  during the "lock down" 

thanks everyone! may we pray for a response globally to break these cycles of violence. And keep in prayer the many around the world who have lost loved ones this week... in TX, in all the shootings in the cities of the US and the world, the on going violence in syria, in Iraq, congo and others... the earthquake in Japan... and the yet unborn... yes there are differences in motives, in context, in 'impact' but lives are lost, and may we pray for those grieving. My we take a stand to say "another way is possible!" Lord we pray for Salam, Shalom, Peace.

http://www.facebook.com/In.Tanzir.We.Believe
A group of Bostonians sent a message of love back to Syria! YES! 

FB status update Friday

John 16:33

"...I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." Thanks for sharing this Verse bro! (Joe Durfey) 

FB status Friday night: 

Suspect #2 Dzhokhar has been taken into custody, alive in Watertown. Pray for officials, for medical team treating his injuries and blood loss. What does "bring to justice" mean for this young man? What does it mean to love our enemies? Lord we pray for wisdom, and not a spirit of revenge and hatred. It is all just so heartbreaking. I am glad he is not still on the run with the potential of doing more harm.

RT @TheBatman When Gotham needs a hero they look to Batman. When Boston needs a hero they just look to the person standing next to them.

And now today, is the one week anniversary of this tragedy. I was walking through the city at 2:50 when there was a moment of silence. at the coffee shop a sign was posted that they would be joining in the observance. I heard over the radio on a police man i was walking past "Moment of Silence, we will observe a moment of silence" .... and i stopped for a while. then walked a bit, and people all around the commons were standing still. I hear at the memorial down on Berkeley and Boylston the "moment" lasted for close to 10 minutes. silent. remembering. grieving.
but life was continuing around the city. music playing in the commons, hippies out celebrating Earth Day with their hoola-hoops and drums, kids running and playing. I think it seemed everyone had an extra depth of thankfulness for life, for the sun, for the breath that we have been given. I pray that people turned to thank and find their creator today.
I walked down to the memorial later today and read through some of the signs. 

On Twitter (which i don't actually have... but saw this) Boston Police Dept. ‏@Boston_Police23h

How do we spell team? We spell it like this: BPD, FBI, ATF, MSP, MBTA, WPD, ICE, NEMLEC, EMS, BFD, MIT, SWAT and YOU. We r #BostonStrong

And then- the question is - What is to be done with Dzhokhar? "Suspect #2", "white hat"?

What does justice look like for this young man... only 19 years old? found bleeding, hiding  in the bottom of a boat. 

I don't really know. But my heart aches for him. What led him and his brother to commit such an act, what must have been going through their heads and hearts. So very sad. 

He was shot through the throat. somehow survived. He can write responses but can't talk yet. He is still in critical condition, though they say improving. He asked about his brother first thing.
 Today he was officially charged with the crime at his bedside. That just makes me so sad. 

He is alone in the hospital unit... they cleared the rest out. 

Alone.
The amount of wreckage, damages, loss he has caused is hard to even count... yet, as Cathi said and I agree - i see Jesus there with him when he was laying in that boat calling to him. Can we pray for him? pray for a change of heart? For his redemption?
The debate is around death penalty, where and when the trial will happen... What does LOVE in action look like here? I dont know. But, it doesn't seem that nursing him to life, to then sentence him to death is what Justice looks like.
 i will pray. 

from the blog post: The Offensive Grace of God

Lord have mercy on us, and may your Kingdom come! your will be done, on earth (in Boston) as it is in heaven.
amen.